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What it feels like to learn you have ptsd!

by | Apr 12, 2023

‘2008’ – A year that I’ll remember for life. We all know about the attacks of 26/11, well, I was not only a witness of it, but also a victim. My family and I were present at the Leopold Café, when a bunch of people entered the café, with guns and started firing. Bloodshed, children crying for their parents, dead bodies all around – I saw it all. While we were finding a place to hide, a bullet ran through my right leg. Nevertheless, we managed to escape.

After few weeks of hospitalisation and operation, I came back home. Two months passed by, everything seemed to get back to normal. But not for me. I couldn’t sleep at night. The moment I closed my eyes, I could see the red blood floor, people running for their lives and the terrorist looking right into my eyes, while shooting a bullet at me.  The screams of innocent people were not leaving my ears. Every ring of the doorbell frightened me from within. All my friends used to come over to check upon me, but I just couldn’t bring myself to get out of the room and meet them. Sitting at the dining table with my parents took me back to that day, where we all were sitting at the table before the terrorists arrived. The visuals looked so real as if I was reliving the event.

My parents were worried about this situation of mine and they took me to a psychologist. The psychologist diagnosed this as the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). With many therapy sessions, meditation practices and other relaxation techniques, I was able to sleep at nights without those horrifying visuals. I revisited the café with the psychologist and tried to get rid of the fear associated with it. It took me 6 months to recover, but I DID! I no more get visuals, hear noises or get scared by doorbells. However, though it has been 15 years since that day, I do get goose bumps every time I talk about the 26/11 attacks.

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